Day #5

A picture of somewhere you've been to

Two summers ago, after my first year of teaching, I decided I wanted to go on a big trip to celebrate finishing the year and finally making money. I went and spent 3 weeks in Hawaii. It was so much fun and was just what I wanted. Here are a few pictures from my trip.

Here is a picture of the sunset on Sunset beach. Soul Soothing.



This was the last time I was on the beach on my favorite beach we went to.



I could jump off of this rock all day every day. Now if only I could stop being such a wimp and not plug my nose!



Love this beach. I still dream about being there on a regular basis.

Day #4

10 Likes and 10 Dislikes

Likes:

1. Laughing
2. The mountains
3. The beach
4. Being sweaty from a good workout
5. Chocolate Chip Cookies
6. Heavy blankets that push me into my bed at night
7. Skittles
8. Netflix and Hulu
9. Soul soothing music
10. Painted fingernails and toenails


Dislikes:

1. Lies
2. Beans
3. Getting wet or dirty in my clothes
4. Scary movies
5. Being chased
6. Being forced to do something
7. Whining
8. Cold Feet
9. Being disappointed
10. When things break

Day #3

A Picture of you and your friends:

I don't know which friends to put a picture of so I am going to be putting more than one!






This is a picture from my sisters wedding of some of the friends that I grew up with. There was a group of us of about 15-20 that grew up together and had so much fun. I seriously don't know how I would have survived growing up without all of them.






These are my two roommates that I lived with for the first 2 years that I lived in Pocatello. I am so glad that I was able to find them and have such good people to live with. Moving here was so scary because I didn't know anyone. These two girls helped me turn this place into home. I am beyond grateful for them.






This is Cassie. My best friend. I don't know what to say about her other than she is the best friend that I have ever had and my life would not be the same if she wasn't in it. She has helped me through so many things and I know that we are going to be friends forever.






And last but not least, my family. The best family anyone could ever ask for. They are some of my best friends and I am so glad that they are stuck with me forever.

Day #2

Write about your relationship status:

This is a hard one to write about mostly because there is a simple answer. I am single. So why does that make this hard? Because I don't want to be single. I don't like that I am single. I long for the day that I am not single. And, I don't even see an end in sight to this singledom that I have going on.

It is a strange thing to go through this much of my life alone. Never in any of my dreaming about what life would be like as I got older did I think that I would make it to 26 without being married. I know 26 is not very old, I know that in the end everything will be worked out and I will be happier than I could ever imagine, but right now, its hard to see that. Some days, either when things are going great or things are going horrible, all I wish for is someone to share everything with. For someone to know what I know and to help me or enjoy things with me. I don't want to go on and on and on about why I don't like being single because that doesn't help anything. Believe me, I've tried it. But I will say this... whatever guy I do eventually end up with better be pretty dang amazing and love me more than I can even imagine!

With all of that being said... I do have a little crush going on. Not anything I want to share or write about but it is nice to know that there are guys that exist that are like what I am looking for. Who knows what will or won't happen. But, it is slightly exciting nonetheless.

Day #1

Post a picture of yourself and 10 facts about yourself:





I know the picture is kind of grainy looking but its the best I have for now. I don't have any pictures of just me I realized so I quickly took one with my webcam. This is me on a normal day without any extra effort put into how I look. I figure its good to document an everyday look for myself. And, now I have a picture that kind of shows the sweet tie dye shirt I made this weekend with Catherine.


And now for the facts about myself in no particular order of importance:


1. The members of my family are the most important people in the world to me. I am the middle child of seven. I have 2 parents, 2 brothers, 4 sisters, 2 brother in laws, 1 sister in law, 2 nephews, and 2 nieces. There is no one I would rather be with in the entire world than with my family. They are my best friends and I am so glad that I get to be with them for eternity.

2. I love skittles, ice cream, fresh warm chocolate chip cookies, anything chocolate and peanut butter, and apparently I have a problem staying away from eating junk food.

3. In the past 4 years I have moved 7 times. I now live in my own house where I have lived for the past year and I love it here.

4. I recently quit my job of the last 3 years and currently do not have a plan of what I am going to do next. Although scary, it has been one of the best decisions I have ever made.

5. I would much rather have a small group of extremely close friends that I get to do everything with as opposed to knowing a bunch of different people that I have shallow relationships with.

6. I would do anything for the people that I love. I would go anywhere, anytime, to be there for important events or if they needed me for even the smallest reason. Sometimes, this has been a cause of pain for me because I can care too much and it ends up coming around and biting me in the butt but I wouldn't have it any other way.

7. I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. There is nothing more important to me in the entire world than knowing that I have a Heavenly Father and Brother who want nothing more than my happiness and have given me the true gospel to learn, live and love here on earth.

8. I am happiest when I can lay in my bed at night completely exhausted because my day has been full of fun, busy activities, good friends, lots of laughing, and pure happiness.

9. Growing up in Oregon left a little bit of hippiness in me. I like the easy going carefree attitude that hippies can have. I feel like I was always meant to live somewhere on the beach where I was tan and didn't have to do my hair and could be barefoot and happy all day every day and swim in the ocean whenever I wanted.

10. I don't like getting dirty or wet when I am not prepared, I don't like being chased, and I don't like watching scary movies. But mostly, I don't like feeling betrayed or lied to.

Blog Challenge

I want to write more often on here so I decided to do a 30 day blog challenge. I am not saying that I am going to write on here every day for 30 days but I am going to eventually finish going through this list. There are only a couple of topics that I think are stupid at the end so I might change a few but for the most part, I really like all of this. Here is the list:





I think that this will be good to help me just document some things about my life that I want to remember.

I don't have a title

I have a problem. I spend too much of my life counting on things to go wrong. But, once again I was reminded today that I do this because it seems to happen way too often. I make plans and then things change and it doesn't work out. I am tired of feeling disappointed. I am sitting in my classroom while my students are working and all I can think about is how I am so so sick of this. It is making it hard to be a good teacher. I want to feel excited about something with my whole heart and soul. But, I don't know how to do that anymore. I always have a thought in the back of my head like, 'well don't get your hopes up because chances are its not going to happen'. I don't want to feel like this, I don't want to feel like I live my life in constant fear of disappointment. I just don't know how to change it.

Even though I have written about some of this before I am still going to write it again because I feel like I need to so that I can gather my thoughts.

Let me back up and explain some things. In December I was called to be the Relief Society President in my ward. To say I was overwhelmed is a serious understatement. I didn't know what to do or how to become what I needed to be. My Bishop talked to me a lot about the kind of counselors that I needed to find. He said the most important thing I would do is to find good counselors that would support me and be good examples to the sisters in our ward. I got called on Friday night and I had until Monday night to tell him who I had decided on. I was confused, stressed, humbled, scared, and terrified along with a lot of other emotions. I feel like I have always had a hard time trusting my thoughts and feelings so I was scared I was going to screw something up. But, with all of the doubt and confusion there was one counselor I knew was supposed to be called. I was so sure of it I never for one second thought I might be wrong. And, I was right. She was the exact person the sisters in the ward needed and, in my mind, even more importantly the exact person I needed in my life. Catherine Rider quickly became one of my most treasured friends that I will ever have.

Catherine helps me feel like I am myself. She makes me happy. She was planning on moving in with us next week but she just texted me and apparently her plans have changed. She got a job at home for the summer so she is moving home. To say I'm not too thrilled about that is not even beginning to describe what's going on in my head and my heart. I'm just sad. I'm sad she isn't moving in. I'm scared that I am going to be able to be as happy as I have been recently. I truly believe that one of the main reasons that I have been able to be happy lately is because she is my friend. She reminds me to not take life too seriously. She helps me laugh at things and at myself. She allows me to be sarcastic and witty and just take things more lightly. I don't know what it is about her that helps me to do all of those things but she just does. And I'm sad that she won't still be here to aid me in being a better me.

But at the same time, I am glad that she found a job. I am glad that things are working out for her. I am more than grateful she is my friend. I know that just because she is moving for the summer that it doesn't mean we won't be friends anymore. I am positive that both of our personalities won't allow our friendship to just fade away and I am so happy to know that. Things will be ok and life will go on.

I need to find some faith that there is a plan and things are going according to that plan. It is hard to stay strong and have hope when it seems all of my plans always crumble around me. I guess the key is realizing its not really my plans that matter but His plans. Somehow I will find the strength to move forward. Somehow things will ultimately work out to be better than I ever imagined. I am just hoping this happens sometime soon.