At least...
I am healthy.
I have a safe and comfortable place to live.
I have a job.
I have a family that loves me unconditionally.
I have money to buy food.
I have the ability to learn new things.
I feel ok with who I am most of the time.
I have friends.
But most of all-
I have the knowledge that there is a plan for me.
I know where I am going and what I ultimately want in life.
I have the Gospel of Jesus Christ in my life.
I have the ability to use the atonement every single day
to comfort me and help me when I need it.
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Saturday, October 11, 2008
Sunday, October 5, 2008
Dang
I haven't been a very good blogger lately. I don't know why but I just haven't felt like writing on here much. I guess I don't feel like I haven't had many thoughts worth remembering. This weekend I have been at home for conference and just for a relaxing weekend. It has been pretty nice to have some time off from life.
This weekend my brothers ex-girlfriend, Bekah, from like 3 years ago came for a surprise visit with my other brother. Devin invited her here. He didn't want us to know that he had done that so it was supposed to be a surprise for our family. But whatever, my brother is a little more transparent than that. He is starting to screw with her emotions again and it makes me mad. Her and I talked for a while and she is really good at saying things like she knows nothing is ever going to happen with them and she's not in love with him anymore but I feel like she is lying to herself. I understand where she is coming from and I know how she feels and I know that there is a part of her that wishes things would work out. I can see myself in her and it makes me ache.
Everything has just made me think a lot about my life and what's going on. And, to add to it all, Daniel called me on Thursday night just to talk. I, for some unknown reason to me or anyone in the world, miss Daniel. It is frustrating. I don't want to miss him. I don't want to wish that I could talk to him. I don't want to have dreams about him. I want to find someone to fill the part of me that feels empty since Daniel has been cut out of my life. I want to care about someone that cares about me the way that I will care about them.
I don't understand why I could want to even associate with someone that has hurt me so many times. There is something seriously wrong with my brain. I wish I didn't love the Robertson family so much. It would be easier if they all weren't so amazing and fun.
This weekend my brothers ex-girlfriend, Bekah, from like 3 years ago came for a surprise visit with my other brother. Devin invited her here. He didn't want us to know that he had done that so it was supposed to be a surprise for our family. But whatever, my brother is a little more transparent than that. He is starting to screw with her emotions again and it makes me mad. Her and I talked for a while and she is really good at saying things like she knows nothing is ever going to happen with them and she's not in love with him anymore but I feel like she is lying to herself. I understand where she is coming from and I know how she feels and I know that there is a part of her that wishes things would work out. I can see myself in her and it makes me ache.
Everything has just made me think a lot about my life and what's going on. And, to add to it all, Daniel called me on Thursday night just to talk. I, for some unknown reason to me or anyone in the world, miss Daniel. It is frustrating. I don't want to miss him. I don't want to wish that I could talk to him. I don't want to have dreams about him. I want to find someone to fill the part of me that feels empty since Daniel has been cut out of my life. I want to care about someone that cares about me the way that I will care about them.
I don't understand why I could want to even associate with someone that has hurt me so many times. There is something seriously wrong with my brain. I wish I didn't love the Robertson family so much. It would be easier if they all weren't so amazing and fun.
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