its goood

today i was driving home from my last cake decorating class. the sun was setting, it was beautiful. i was just driving along thinking about my life and basically i realized, i am happy. yes there are things that i really need to still work on and there are things that are not even close to perfect or how i want them but overall, i am a happy person. but why am i happy? if you were to examine my life it is not all that exciting. my days fill with working out, reading, watching lame tv shows i rent from the library, make dinner every once in a while, hanging out with the parents or sisters, or something else that is not exciting. i don't really have friends here. i don't go out and do a ton of stuff. so why am i happy? i am happy because i decided a bit ago that i was going to be. the weeks before visiting the amazing beauty of salmon idaho things were looking pretty grim for me. i wasn't doing anything with my life, i was just existing. but, something about that trip.... everything about that trip. the drive, the friends, the hike, the hot springs, sleeping outside, laughing again like i used to, being happy... it reminded me of who i like to be and how to be me. and the best part about it? it was me who decided to be happy again. my happiness was not connected to another person. and that makes me even happier.