the final say

I have been thinking about daniel the last couple of days and i really couldn't figure out why for a while. i mean it wasn't like i was thinking about wanting to talk to him all the time or wanting to see him or wanting to be around him or anything like that. he has just been on my mind. today i was thinking about him again in church and i realized that it was just really strange to think that now that he is getting married that kind of puts a final end to the whole daniel and tyleen soap opera. nothing will ever happen again. nothing will ever be confusing. i won't ever let myself get caught up in it and get hurt. it really is done. and.... i am so happy about that. i haven't thought about daniel like that in probably over a year and i am glad he is getting married. sure i was a little wierded out when he told me he was getting married but i think that was just because i really just couldn't imagine daniel finally making a decision like that and moving forward. so today i decided to send him an email. over a year ago i wrote on this blog some things about daniel and the kind of girl i hoped he would find. well i decided to send it to him. the post i am talking about you can read here but i sent him that and then i wrote this:

so i thought i would share that with you. hopefully this girl does all of these things which i am sure she does if you want to marry her. i hope you know i really am happy for you. good job moving to this point in your life. I am going to miss knowing you're my friend that i know would be up for a good adventure anytime but i am glad you now have a permanent adventure buddy. thanks for all you taught me and thanks for helping me grow into the person i am now. i couldn't have learned a lot of really important things if it wasn't for you. hope you know that i am sorry if i ever caused you too much grief or stress. sometimes i was too much of a girl for even myself to handle :) but i really do wish you the best of luck and hope you are just so happy you can't believe it. this girl better be amazing cause you deserve it. love you my friend, and good luck.

maybe some people might think that was not an appropriate thing for me to send to someone who is engaged but who cares. i wanted him to know and its not like he's married yet. i really am grateful for all of the lessons i learned dealing with daniel. ya it was hell but i wouldn't be who i am today if i hadn't gone through it all. i really do want him to be happy and i think he finally is.