Sunday, March 30, 2008
life
why do i seem to constantly seem to surround myself with people that let me down? i am tired of having friends who say they are going to do something and then it doesn't happen. i guess that it is human nature though. no one is perfect. it is just tiring. life is tiring.
Monday, March 24, 2008
Deciding to be Happy
So a while ago I came across this article and I really liked it so I bookmarked it. Today I was just thinking about a lot of things and I randomly decided to read it again. It has a lot of good points and it has given me a lot to think about and consider. Here is the link and a few parts I really liked.
http://lifestyle.msn.com/mindbodyandsoul/personalgrowth/articlegh.aspx?cp-documentid=5945810>1=10822
"The study authors suspect that a downside of feeling happy most of the time is that you expect to feel that way all the time. So when good things happen, it seems normal, but when bad things happen, it can seem catastrophic."
"Those only are happy who have their minds fixed on some object other than their own happiness; on the happiness of others, on the improvement of mankind.... Aiming thus at something else, they find happiness by the way."
"Some people are able to make the best of things that happen — and that's a key to happiness"
http://lifestyle.msn.com/mindbodyandsoul/personalgrowth/articlegh.aspx?cp-documentid=5945810>1=10822
"The study authors suspect that a downside of feeling happy most of the time is that you expect to feel that way all the time. So when good things happen, it seems normal, but when bad things happen, it can seem catastrophic."
"Those only are happy who have their minds fixed on some object other than their own happiness; on the happiness of others, on the improvement of mankind.... Aiming thus at something else, they find happiness by the way."
"Some people are able to make the best of things that happen — and that's a key to happiness"
Thursday, March 20, 2008
Spring Break
Spring Break has been amazing so far. It started out with Cass coming to visit. I think that we saw all of Las Vegas in one weekend which is quite a feat if I do say so myself. We were on the strip for 12 hours on Saturday. Yep that's right, 12 hours! It was insanely fun. Probably the highlight of the day was riding the roller coasters on top of the stratosphere. They were amazing! I love roller coasters and usually I don't get scared, just incredibly excited but I admit, one of them scared the crap out of me! It was a teeter-totter type ride. I was hanging over the edge of the building with nothing but a stupid lap bar holding me in. What was I thinking?! Needless to say, I had tons of fun even if my throat was sore from screaming so loud. That weekend was a weekend of firsts. First time on the stratosphere, first time seeing a live fashion show, first time gashing my head open.... Yep that's right, Sunday morning I hit my head and cut it open. Let me tell you, heads bleed. A lot. It turned out to not be so bad and I was able to just get by without stitches. It was so fun having Cass around and hanging out with her again. It was a great way to start my week off!
Tuesday I left for California. I am still here staying at my Aunt and Uncle's house. It has been fun and relaxing. Last night we went to the beach to watch the sun set. It was beautiful! I am glad that I decided to come. Today we have plans to go and check out LA and I get to finally meet my cousin's husband. I think I'll take off sometime tomorrow morning. I might go shopping or something before I head out.
I only have 2 more weeks of student teaching once I'm back. It is hard to believe that I am almost done and almost graduated. I got information about graduation this morning. It is hard to believe that I made it to this point. I have been working towards this goal since I was 5 years old and I can't believe its here. I am excited/nervous/scared/thrilled/etc to see what will come next for me.
Tuesday I left for California. I am still here staying at my Aunt and Uncle's house. It has been fun and relaxing. Last night we went to the beach to watch the sun set. It was beautiful! I am glad that I decided to come. Today we have plans to go and check out LA and I get to finally meet my cousin's husband. I think I'll take off sometime tomorrow morning. I might go shopping or something before I head out.
I only have 2 more weeks of student teaching once I'm back. It is hard to believe that I am almost done and almost graduated. I got information about graduation this morning. It is hard to believe that I made it to this point. I have been working towards this goal since I was 5 years old and I can't believe its here. I am excited/nervous/scared/thrilled/etc to see what will come next for me.
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
who-rah
Tuesday is basically done, that means just 3 more school days and spring break is here. That means cass comes!!! i am so excited to see her. Its been weird not living by her since we have basically been together for the entire last year including last summer where i don't think we ever went more than like 4 waking hours without seeing each other. its going to be a never ending party! Then, Tuesday i go to California to soak up some more sun and bask in the glory of loving family. 3 more days... i can do it!
Sunday, March 9, 2008
fitting of my thoughts today
"Til Kingdom Come"
Steal my heart and hold my tongue.
I feel my time, my time has come.
Let me in, unlock the door.
I've never felt this way before.
The wheels just keep on turning,
The drummer begins to drum,
I don't know which way I'm going,
I don't know which way I've come.
Hold my head inside your hands,
I need someone who understands.
I need someone, someone who hears,
For you, I've waited all these years.
For you, I'd wait 'til kingdom come.
Until my day, my day is done.
And say you'll come, and set me free,
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me.
In your tears and in your blood,
In your fire and in your flood,
I hear you laugh, I heard you sing,
"I wouldn't change a single thing.
"The wheels just keep on turning,
The drummers begin to drum,
I don't know which way I'm going,
I don't know what I've become.
For you, I'd wait 'til kingdom come,
Until my days, my days are done.
Say you'll come and set me free,
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me.
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me.
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me.
Steal my heart and hold my tongue.
I feel my time, my time has come.
Let me in, unlock the door.
I've never felt this way before.
The wheels just keep on turning,
The drummer begins to drum,
I don't know which way I'm going,
I don't know which way I've come.
Hold my head inside your hands,
I need someone who understands.
I need someone, someone who hears,
For you, I've waited all these years.
For you, I'd wait 'til kingdom come.
Until my day, my day is done.
And say you'll come, and set me free,
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me.
In your tears and in your blood,
In your fire and in your flood,
I hear you laugh, I heard you sing,
"I wouldn't change a single thing.
"The wheels just keep on turning,
The drummers begin to drum,
I don't know which way I'm going,
I don't know what I've become.
For you, I'd wait 'til kingdom come,
Until my days, my days are done.
Say you'll come and set me free,
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me.
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me.
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me.
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
remembering to be grateful
Last night was.... interesting.
I did not want to go to FHE at all but I forced myself to go. I decided I was going to go for the lesson only and then I would leave. Well, once I got there I found out that the activity was a service project of going around and collecting canned food for the salvation army and so I felt guilty leaving. I still was not in the mood to meet new people, to socialize, to do any of that typical fhe stuff. I decided to just go with my roommate and 2 other guy student teachers went with us too. I was glad, no new people, just do the project and get out of there. Well right as we were going to the cars a guy from our ward asked if he could fill our empty seat. This guy is a Sunday school teacher in my ward. Last Sunday my roommate leaned over and told me that she thought he was cute and that he and I would look good together. Immediately my answer was no, not my style. This guy is what I like to call a grade a wiener. Just your normal cheese ball. Well, he came with us and I must say, he turned out to be a pretty cool guy (still not someone I would be interested in - picture your byu, provo, popped collar guy and that's him) but I admit, my first impression was wrong. Something that I need to remember, don't judge people before actually getting to know them.
Well, I got home a lot later than I had planned and I still had to prepare my lesson for one of my math classes the next day. Some of my roommates were watching a movie so I decided to watch and plan. I got my books, notebook, laptop and sat on the couch. Before getting to work I checked my email and I had received a response to an email that I had written the night before. It was a very nice email and it made me feel good but at the same time it made me sad. For some reason lately my emotions have been close to the surface. I didn't want to have my roommates see me cry and have to explain so I just moved to my room to have some alone time to think and reflect. I realized that no matter what stage of life we are in we are always going to have challenge and change to deal with but that's ok. That is why we are here. I realized that the problems that I may have going on are really not that huge and I will get through them. And, once I have figured this stage of my life out, new problems and new changes will come along and I will have to deal with those and learn and keep going. This is what we do in life, over and over. But, I know that things will work out and that we will make it through our trials. I know that we are taught and people always say that we will never be given a challenge that we cannot handle. I don't know if I completely agree with that. Let me explain. I know that some of the things that have happened to me in my life I could not have made it through, on my own. On my own there is no way that I could make it through my trials without falling. But, I have been thinking lately, we do not have to do it on our own. We have been given the gift of the spirit, a loving savior, personal revelation and more gifts that we know from a loving Heavenly Father. And so, we don't have to make it through our trials on our own. We are given more help than we can imagine. We will never be given something that we cannot handle, without help. Sometimes, I forget that and try to do it on my own and I fail. It is at those times when I am most unhappy and make the least amount of progress. I love how things happen that make you remember important truths that somehow we forget as we go through every day life.
And so, basically, I am grateful for the email that made me start thinking about these things. I am grateful for people listening to the spirit and being a tool in our Heavenly Father's hand. I am grateful for important relationships that teach us things that we would have a hard time learning on our own.
I did not want to go to FHE at all but I forced myself to go. I decided I was going to go for the lesson only and then I would leave. Well, once I got there I found out that the activity was a service project of going around and collecting canned food for the salvation army and so I felt guilty leaving. I still was not in the mood to meet new people, to socialize, to do any of that typical fhe stuff. I decided to just go with my roommate and 2 other guy student teachers went with us too. I was glad, no new people, just do the project and get out of there. Well right as we were going to the cars a guy from our ward asked if he could fill our empty seat. This guy is a Sunday school teacher in my ward. Last Sunday my roommate leaned over and told me that she thought he was cute and that he and I would look good together. Immediately my answer was no, not my style. This guy is what I like to call a grade a wiener. Just your normal cheese ball. Well, he came with us and I must say, he turned out to be a pretty cool guy (still not someone I would be interested in - picture your byu, provo, popped collar guy and that's him) but I admit, my first impression was wrong. Something that I need to remember, don't judge people before actually getting to know them.
Well, I got home a lot later than I had planned and I still had to prepare my lesson for one of my math classes the next day. Some of my roommates were watching a movie so I decided to watch and plan. I got my books, notebook, laptop and sat on the couch. Before getting to work I checked my email and I had received a response to an email that I had written the night before. It was a very nice email and it made me feel good but at the same time it made me sad. For some reason lately my emotions have been close to the surface. I didn't want to have my roommates see me cry and have to explain so I just moved to my room to have some alone time to think and reflect. I realized that no matter what stage of life we are in we are always going to have challenge and change to deal with but that's ok. That is why we are here. I realized that the problems that I may have going on are really not that huge and I will get through them. And, once I have figured this stage of my life out, new problems and new changes will come along and I will have to deal with those and learn and keep going. This is what we do in life, over and over. But, I know that things will work out and that we will make it through our trials. I know that we are taught and people always say that we will never be given a challenge that we cannot handle. I don't know if I completely agree with that. Let me explain. I know that some of the things that have happened to me in my life I could not have made it through, on my own. On my own there is no way that I could make it through my trials without falling. But, I have been thinking lately, we do not have to do it on our own. We have been given the gift of the spirit, a loving savior, personal revelation and more gifts that we know from a loving Heavenly Father. And so, we don't have to make it through our trials on our own. We are given more help than we can imagine. We will never be given something that we cannot handle, without help. Sometimes, I forget that and try to do it on my own and I fail. It is at those times when I am most unhappy and make the least amount of progress. I love how things happen that make you remember important truths that somehow we forget as we go through every day life.
And so, basically, I am grateful for the email that made me start thinking about these things. I am grateful for people listening to the spirit and being a tool in our Heavenly Father's hand. I am grateful for important relationships that teach us things that we would have a hard time learning on our own.
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