Birthday Time

I can't believe that it is already April and already time for my birthday. This year has been going by pretty dang fast. This year has been good and it has been hard all at the same time.

Right before Christmas break I got called to be the Relief Society President of my ward. To say that I was stressed about it and overwhelmed is a MAJOR understatement. I think that I had a few mental breakdowns the week that I was supposed to be figuring out who my counselors were supposed to be. It was a long hard week that included getting killed in a few basketball games, having one of the girl's dads yell at me after a game, remembering that I had forgotten to get my sprinklers blown out for the winter, and other small things that set me off way more than they should have. But, I have adjusted and finally started to feel comfortable. Although in a week from today everything is going to change because they are reorganizing all of the wards around here and its going to be a big change and a hard change and then I'll be all stressed again.

My birthday was yesterday. I turned 26. I don't want to be 26. That feels old. It is closer to 30 than it is to 20. That is the age the my sister told me (like 2 or 3 years ago and she probably didn't realize it would come true) that if you weren't married by then then people would wonder what was wrong with you. I am getting older and things are still not happening for me. And at times, that is a very hard thing to realize. But, I have had some very very good conversations with my bishop lately that have reassured me that things will be ok and that there is a plan and that I just need to have faith that things will work out. It is a hard thing to do but I have to keep trying. And besides, every once in a while things happen and people come into my life that I realize wouldn't have happened if I was already married. So, I can be grateful for that.

Even though things have been hard leading up to my birthday and I didn't really want it to come there have been good things happening too. I have a friend that is actually one of my counselors in Relief Society. Her name is Catherine and I love her. She makes me laugh so hard every time I talk to her. She has helped me so much in the last couple of weeks to remember how to be happy doing every day things and for that I am so grateful that she is my friend. She has had some ups and downs in her life and in the last year has made some major changes. It is so inspiring to talk to her and learn from her and just know her. I am glad that I have had to opportunity to get to know her and I am glad that she is my friend.

Well, I need to do lots and lots better about writing on here. I am not doing a very good job about keeping a record about my life. I want to be better because I really do like being able to look back and remember things that happened and things I learned. Its just hard when I feel like I am in a bad mood and sad so much of the time. But, I am determined to do better about that and about writing on here. Pray I keep this attitude in my life.